sMACkDown Recap – July 4, 2017

John Cena Returns

On the Fourth of July edition of WWE SmackDown, we saw the return of John Cena. As usual, his promo was interrupted early on by the “John Cena sucks” chants while he tried to address rumors from other Superstars that he was a part-timer. To one up their claims, Cena declares he’s an “all-timer” and eludes to the fact that he will be appearing on RAW and SmackDown. 

Whenever Cena makes an appearance, 2 things happen: 1. I get the fanboy chills when his music hits, and 2. I find myself wondering what size t-shirt he wears. He’s a massive human being, but somehow finds t-shirts that are baggy on him. Are they a custom size not available on the WWE Shop? I guess we’ll never know. 

Also, Rusev made an appearance, looking as handsome as ever and laid the groundwork for a USA vs. Bulgaria feud, kicking off with a “Flag Match” at the upcoming PPV, Battleground. 

It looks like we’re getting more AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens.

AJ Styles won his way into the Independence Day Battle Royal by defeating Chad Gable in an interesting match that pitted the high flying Styles against a Greco Roman master in Chad Gable. With his victory in the Independence Day Battle Royal, AJ Styles is now the #1 Contender for Kevin Owens’ United States Championship Belt. 

Carmellabration

The cringeworthy James Ellsworth continued to be a thorn in the WWE Universe’s side by cancelling the Fourth of July to celebrate Carmella, the current holder of the first ever Women’s Money in the Bank contract. Thankfully Naomi interrupted with her epilepsy unfriendly entrance to break up the party. 

Can we talk about how Rusev should be Lana’s arm candy now that she’s wrestling? It would be funny to see Rusev play the part of the escort considering his abilities to bring humor to otherwise boring matches, like when Lana gets beat in less than 20 seconds by Naomi. 

I won’t even get started on the Rap Battle hosted by Wale. The New Day and Usos will never be rappers. I am very confident in saying that. 

Can we please get more Breezango promos? They have that old school WWF feel that has made SmackDown better than RAW in recent months. It’s just too bad they’re not as good and entertaining in the ring as they are in their promos. 

Overall, this was a take it or leave it episode of SmackDown. Luckily Randy Orton was there to beat the hell out of Aiden English after a terrible singing promo. Orton got disqualified for crushing English with the steel stairs, but that just led to Jinder Mahal coming out to talk crap to us Americans, calling us racist and ignorant because we aren’t fans of roided out people from Calgary who pretend to be from India. 

Maybe next week we’ll get more Women’s division action, which this episode severely lacked.

Be sure to hit me up on Twitter @MillironMac to tell me what you liked about this episode of SmackDown or want to talk wrestling with another grown man instead of your 12 year old nephew. 

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