Today I Tried: Alert Caffeinated Gum

I’m not a coffee person. I can honestly say I’ve never tried a cup before in my life. The bitter smell never appealed to me, so as an adult needing a morning pick-me-up, I usually went with an energy drink (Red Bull, Monster Ultra and Kick Start’s being my go-to).

Well, apparently, energy drinks are awful for your heart, and since I’d like to stay alive to see a Cincinnati team finally make a post-season run in the late 2030’s, I figure I’d try to find some other way to wake up in the morning. The other day at Kroger, I saw this caffeine gum called Alert in the check-out aisle.

It was $2.49 for 8 pieces. Pretty pricey compared to a normal pack of gum, but can you really put a price on your heart health? The answer is yes. I finally tried a piece of it today. Gross.

Caffeine is naturally very bitter. This gum does not hide that bitterness one bit, and the first couple of minutes are pretty painful to get through. Maybe that’s why I feel so awake now. It’s not the caffeine, it’s the awful smack it gave my taste buds.

I can’t recommend this gum. Maybe use in an emergency to stay awake, but I’d much rather just chug a 5 Hour Energy. I’ve got 7 more pieces if anyone else wants to ruin their next early morning.

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