Ray Lewis Thinks Stabbing Someone Is Better Than Boating With Your Boys… My Words, Not His. (Our lawyers made me add that last part)

So let me get this straight. A guy isn’t allowed to have legal fun (if you’re willing to overlook the pot and “foreign white substance” seen in some photos), but getting all stabby in Hotlanta is acceptable?

james franco wait

That’s the way Ray Lewis sees the world. 

While spending his morning as a guest on the miserable excuse for a human life Colin Cowherd’s show, Ray Lewis had a few takes on the Odell Beckham situation in New York that made my eyes roll so hard they bounced off the back of my skull.

“Where there’s no God, there’s chaos. Odell has removed God from his life. This is a kid who grew up under the covenant of who God really is. And everything he’s doing, he’s crying out for help. We have a lot of people reporting about it, but it’s always been the duty of elders to go back to help him. So that’s why I raised my hand. I told him ‘I’m here. Whatever you need.’”

Remember, this is the guy who (allegedly) killed not one, but two guys and got away with it. Yes, the same guy who ditched his blood stained suit in a dumpster after his OJ Simpson cosplay routine is now preaching about having God in your life. I’m more likely to take cooking lessons from Jeffrey Dahmer than following Ray Lewis’ life lessons, no matter what he says. He could’ve said “you know Odell, I don’t think Barry Larkin gets recognition for his greatness despite the Hall of Fame induction” and I’d still tell Ray Lewis to fuck off. Do I believe Barry Larkin was a gift from God to the baseball world? Yes, but if Ray Lewis is saying it, it makes me question it a little bit.

I really don’t get all the hubbub around Odell Beckham and why people think he’s such a problem. So the guy likes to have a little fun and just one lady at at time isn’t enough for him. Why become an NFL wide receiver if you can’t live that lifestyle? I’m not saying I think every pass catching freak of nature should live life full-tilt with ladies, booze, and that gat-damn rock music; but if Odell wants to live that way, so be it. Does it make him less of a wide receiver and not worthy of catching passes from The Last Manning Standing? I don’t think so. In fact, it might make him a better wide receiver because he’s fueled to keep up that lifestyle and he knows catching passes is his only way to keep a good thing going.

Knowing that I need blogging to fuel my cheese coney benders is all that keeps me going some days. If it weren’t for that, I doubt I’d even have carpal tunnel. Can you imagine such a world? I don’t think I want to, but it’s all for the love of the game and it’s what keeps guys like me and Odell ticking.

Keep the coney eating and pass catching to freaks like me and Odell (respectively), Ray. Sir Beckham is just fine in New York and he’ll have the last laugh when he catches 12 touchdowns on a 7-9 team. You’re just lucky it was trash day behind some restaurant in Atlanta.

On second thought, never mind. Odell’s a cancer and New York should trade him immediately.. I’m thinking: Odell Beckham for Vontaze Burfict and a batch of Mike Brown’s famous Mock Turtle Soup. I’ll make the trade call for ya.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s