The Undertaker’s “Surprise” Appearance at WrestleMania Breeds Copycat Acts in the High School Ranks

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USA TODAY – A high school girl from Georgia arrived to prom in a casket, and videos of the reveal have since gone viral.

“I was shocked,” Alexandrea Clark told 11Alive over Skype Monday. “I didn’t know that it was going to go that viral.”

Clark arrived to her senior prom in a hearse on Saturday at Americus Sumter High School. She took the short, five to 10-minute ride from the funeral home to school. She said her vision for her grand entrance was two years in the making.

What in the actual fuck? If you read the whole article, which I reluctantly did, Alexandrea said this was a way to encourage her classmates to not drink and drive. I get that, but I always found the snatching-keys-with-two-fingered-poke-to-the-sternum more effective. Showing up in a casket inside a hearse is bizarre despite the meanings behind the act. Ms. Clark plans on being a funeral director after school, which is great and all, but I planned on being a huge disappointment to my family after school and guess what, I went to prom like the rest of my classmates rather than showing up as my future self (40lbs overweight and losing hair faster than you can say Propecia). I don’t know what would be creepier: post-late-20’s Mac showing up to a high school prom or chicks rolling up in caskets.   Continue reading

I Have Confidence in the Blue Jackets, and That Scares Me

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There are few things in the world better than playoff hockey. Unfortunately, as a Blue Jacket fan, I’ve only gotten to experience the feeling a limited number of times, and never beyond the first round. This is the year that all changes though. The Blue Jackets will give me something I’m really not used to as a Cincinnati sports fan: a winning postseason.

I know what you’re saying. “Oh Mac, you’re just being optimistic again like you always are, hoping for the best but never expecting the worse”. You obviously don’t know me. I fully expect my teams to lose every single time they step onto the field (or ice). Until the clock strikes 0:00 and all chances for a video review are exhausted, I still don’t believe my team has won. It’s a miserable life to live, but someone has to. Right?  Continue reading

Programming Note: I’m Taking the Night off From Blogging [Click for Rockies-Padres Fight Blog]

I know a lot of you sit around on Twitter all night long with your friends and family, swiping down and reloading your timeline just waiting for my blog to pop up. Swipe no more my friends, because here it is. Tonight’s a little different though because I decided to take the night off from blogging. I’ve been exhausted lately and I’m really having a hard time trying to decide what to blog about.  Continue reading

Does This Look Like the Face of a Guy Who Stole a Website Idea and Is Now Crapping His Pants on Capitol Hill?

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Let’s just get this out in the open right now. I hate Facebook. Hate hate hate hate it. I have an account, but I only get on when they send me the “hey idiot, you have 74 pending notifications and have been tagged in 43 pictures” email once every couple of months. Truth be told, if I wasn’t worried about losing contact with family and friends that have moved away from Cincinnati, I’d probably scrap my account all together.

Facebook was cool back when it was only available at certain colleges. Did I feel like a bad ass when Ohio University was added to Facebook and other shithead and poser schools weren’t approved yet? God damn right I did. There was nothing better than editing someone’s wall to make it look like one of your other friends said or did something embarrassing. Want a private group only certain people on your dorm’s floor can join as a memento of something funny that happened at 3am on a random Wednesday? Well “I remember when Jack pissed his pants after too much Southern Comfort” was a group ready to spit out invites to anyone who was there. If you don’t understand anything I just said in the last paragraph, no I won’t buy you beer for your senior prom.  Continue reading

I Don’t Get Most Reds Fans

I’m baffled. I follow a number of Reds fans on Twitter, and they kind of confuse me. The talk all offseason was how we didn’t do much in free agency, and how we weren’t going to be very good this season. Now, everyone is surprised that they’re off to a bad start? Is it because we (yea, I’m one of those fans that say “we,” get over it) are off to a worse start than expected? It’s the beginning of the season people, chill out.

If you think this is a bad start, I’ve got some horrifying news for you: things probably aren’t going to get any better immediately. Suarez getting hit in the thumb by an errant pitch isn’t great for business. The bats haven’t been there yet for the team, with Geno and Scooter being a couple of the exceptions. And if the Reds choose to bring up top prospect Nick Senzel on Friday, I’m not expecting him to be an all-star. The kid has barely played any AA and AAA ball. He’s still very raw.

In the meantime, as we struggle through this long season, I’m going to try and focus on the fun parts of the team. Like Billy being amazing in the outfield, and lightning on the base paths. I love seeing Tucker calling a good game and swinging the bat well early on. Hell, I even laugh whenever Joey trolls the fans, like last night in Philly.

While we wait for this team to produce runs, I’ll try to enjoy this young pitching rotation as they learn how to be major leaguers. It’s not going to be fun every night, but a lot of the young guns have potential (I’m looking at you Romano, Mahle and Garret).

And please dear lord, don’t let Barry Larkin inherit this team as-is. The last thing I want to happen is for all of Cincinnati to turn on our boy Barry.

Let’s chill out, Reds fans. It’s a 162 game season. The Reds are bound to win 20.

Ray Lewis Thinks Stabbing Someone Is Better Than Boating With Your Boys… My Words, Not His. (Our lawyers made me add that last part)

So let me get this straight. A guy isn’t allowed to have legal fun (if you’re willing to overlook the pot and “foreign white substance” seen in some photos), but getting all stabby in Hotlanta is acceptable?

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That’s the way Ray Lewis sees the world.  Continue reading

WrestleMania 34 Wish List

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I’m sure by now you’ve seen about a million blogs, articles and podcast hosts list their WrestleMania 34 predictions. For the most part, you can usually tell how the show is going to go based on the Vegas betting odds and looking ahead at which Superstars are scheduled for work outside of the wrestling ring, etc.

I try to avoid those unless I don’t have much invested in the pay-per-view, and WrestleMania would qualify as one of those special occasions where I’m doing everything within my power to avoid any potential spoilers. So here it goes. This is my wish list of what I hope and think should happen at WrestleMania 34 in New Orleans.  Continue reading