If the Bengals Hire Hue Jackson or Vance Joseph, Parting Ways With Marvin Lewis Was Pointless

At this point it feels like we’re just beating a dead horse with all of the Hue Jackson rumors. Personally, I think there’s about a 10-15% chance Hue Jackson is named the 10th head coach in Bengals history. If the season ticket holders weren’t dropping faster than bottles of hair bleach in Guy Fieri’s bathroom, I would’ve set it at a 50/50 scenario. Mike Brown likes familiarity, so Hue Jackson and Vance Joseph (former Bengals DB coach) would be “logical” choices for the next head coach, but Mike Brown is smart enough to see how much the coaching decision could hit his wallet if it doesn’t win back the fan base. Continue reading

Despite What You’re Reading Today, Marvin Lewis Did Not Endorse Hue Jackson as the Bengals New Head Coach

If you’ve been on Twitter today or paid any attention to the news coming out of Cincinnati, you were probably led to believe part of Marvin Lewis’ final day as the Cincinnati Bengals head coach was spent endorsing his buddy Hue Jackson for the position he vacated when he and Mike Brown “came to an agreement” that it was time to part ways. Continue reading

As Expected, Hue Jackson is Returning to the Cincinnati Bengals

Some love stories are too beautiful to end. Even though this love story has the feeling of a Romeo and Juliet-esque ending, the Hue Jackson and Marvin Lewis love saga is getting another chapter.

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Who Dat Got Hurt? Dez Bryant Likely Out For Season With Torn Achilles

Is it possible to not feel bad for the Saints but also feel bad for Dez Bryant in this situation? I don’t just say that because our mighty Bengals host the juggernaut New Orleans Saints this week. The Saints were a prime example of the rich getting richer with the signing of Dez Bryant this week. They just out gunned the previously undefeated St. Louis Los Angeles Rams of Anaheim Located in Southern California West of Nevada in Week 9. Did they really need to add Dez Bryant, a stud wide receiver even though he 100% did not catch that ball in Green Bay? They were the lucky winners in Dez’s game of wait and see, but unfortunately it looks like Dez will be on the Free Agency Tour of 2019 without stepping foot on the field in 2018. Sound like anyone else you know, Pittsburgh fans? Continue reading

A.J. Green Expected to Miss More Time Than Originally Thought With Foot Injury. Shit

This is the definition of “not ideal”. The Bengals have fought the injury bug all season on both sides of the ball, but this seems to be the injury that will send the Bengals into a downward spiral. Tyler Boyd has been a huge success but it’s largely a product of A.J. Green drawing a lot of attention from defenses. Speedster John Ross hasn’t been able to stay on the field and they’re currently on their 428th tight end. Giovanni Bernard should be returning soon, but hopefully Joe Mixon is ready to carry the ball 60 times a game.

I was excited for the bye week because I could sit around and enjoy the games without being stressed out by the Bengals. Once again, the team that will put me in the grave before I’m 40 has decided to ruin another Sunday for me. And they’re not even playing. Figure that one out.

It’s an Oil Change Saturday!

 

No, not that kind of oil change. Thank God.

Now that you’re done having an anxiety attack from thinking about giving yourself an oil change, we can move on.

Don’t get too excited though, this won’t be a regular recurring blog. I don’t drive that often so it takes me a while to hit the standard 5,000-7,500 miles most vehicle manuals suggest for an ol’ swapperoo of the black sludge and overpriced filter. Some auto parts stores give you a free filter when you buy 5-quarts of oil, but these oil change places aren’t so generous. I feel bad saying that because they gave me free coffee and a bottle of water while I wait. Now I feel bad for not considering the free WiFi access they gave me (which isn’t showing up on my list of available networks, but I’m not one to complain about such things). The coffee is a little burnt, which I suspect is a result of it being brewed this morning when they opened at 8am. I don’t want to disappoint anyone that thought this might be a blog about oil changes and the different places people take their cars to get their oil changed (e.g. their parents house, dealerships, a buddy’s place or your favorite local mechanic), but I think I’ll jump into some sports while I wait on my car. Continue reading